Ingleesh

In many Latin American countries, certain English words have been absorbed into the local vernacular. Obviously, English words are commonly used for items which have been introduced from abroad, such as technology -- USB=flash, mouse=mouse, laptop=laptop, to click=hacer click. However, other words that have been borrowed seem somewhat random. In Peru, for example, a toilet is called a "water." It is difficult to predict when locals will opt to maintain the English word for a particular object. One time I spent a good 15 minutes trying to buy masking tape to discover that it is called, go figure, cinta masking.

English is also used in some rather unexpected ways, often in advertising or as a status symbol. For example, the other day I encountered an advertisement for the "one-piece legend" toilet. The entire sign was in Spanish except for the words one-piece legend. First of all, what kind of toilet deserves the name one-piece legend. Also, since most Peruvians can't even understand those words, to them it is actually the "a bunch of gibberish" toilet.

Also, some words maintain the proper English pronunciation while others acquire a Spanish twist. Consider the word huachiman, a botched version of watchman which is pronounced watchymon. Or brother, used as slang for friend and pronounced bro-der. For the English speaker, this unpredictable use of English can be confusing. Once, at Starbucks, I tried to order a "moofeen" only to have the girl behind the counter confirm my order of one muffin. Then Susan, confused because at Starbucks muffins were actually called muffins, attempted to order a cookie and received baffled looks because they had no idea what she was talking about. My friend Michelle once called a hostel called Hobo Hideout and, of course, pronounced it in Spanish (Hobo He-dow-te). The receptionist was like, "Um, Hobo Hideout?" As a general rule, it is safe to assume that, when using English in Peru, you, the English speaker, will always be wrong.

- - - - - - -

The other day a Peruvian doctor was practicing her English with Susan and I when she reacted to something Susan said with "Oh baby!" I don't even remember what Susan had said but it certainly didn't merit an "Oh baby!"